I feel like I need to clarify something up front here....I am not a helicopter mom, but I am always close enough that I know if something went seriously wrong, I could swoop in if needed. I was better at hovering when I was a SAHM with Brennon, but now I am much better at stepping back, allowing my boys to try to solve most problems on their own, and jumping in to play with them for short intervals. Ok, so now that you know that, let me tell you about something that has been on my mind pretty much non-stop for the past 24 hours.
Yesterday after school, the boys and I went swimming at my friend Leslie's house after school. It was sweltering outside again, and it wasn't worth even being outside without being in the pool, so it was a perfect day to relax in the pool (especially after Leslie and I--and the rest of the second grade teachers--were testing kids all day at school). We had spent pretty much all summer in the pool at either Leslie's house, the water park, my Aunt Nancy's house, or Mimi & Pop's house...oh, and in our little backyard pool too, of course. At the beginning of the summer, I had to spend most of an afternoon coaxing the boys into the pool. They just wanted to hang out on the stairs or "on dry land". Finally, they were both loving being in the water and becoming little fishes who were becoming quite happy to be in the water. I love that, because now they wanted to jump off the side or even the diving board and have me catch them or they'd want to swim around the pool hanging on to me or sometimes they just wanted to throw things in and have me dive after them. Anyway, we were really having fun swimming. Each time we went swimming, I became a little more comfortable with them being around the water myself and I didn't worry so much about them. They knew their limits and I trusted that they would pay attention to them.
Back to yesterday, I was taking times swimming the boys around the pool and I had just set Brennon up on the side. I took off my sunglasses and set them on the side of the pool, and then I was swimming back and forth across the shallow end while the boys played on the side of the pool. I had just come up from going under to get my hair wet and cool myself off in the 105 degree heat, when I hear a splash. I look over and Gavin is under the water. I probably was moving close to the speed of light to swim to him, but it felt like the entire world was moving in slow motion. I have never felt such sheer terror in my heart as I saw the top of his head barely peeking out of the top of the water. I know that he could not have been under the water for more than 2 full seconds, but it seemed like an eternity.
He was fine, just scared, but I know that he couldn't have been more scared than I was. It was awful. I hugged him and squeezed him and loved him a little more. I cannot imagine what could have happened so quickly if I hadn't been right there, paying better attention, hovering closely by. So, my helicopter might be a little closer at the pool next time, but more than anything I have thought about my boys nonstop since then. Before bed, I said extra thanks for them, first thing this morning, I gave thanks for them being safe, healthy boys, and throughout the day I couldn't wait to see them. I'm not going to become a crazy worrying, controlling mom. That's not me, but I may just move my helicopter's perimeter a bit closer.
Today, my friend Leslie said she was impressed with how calm I was and how well I handled it, and I thought to myself, "SERIOUSLY, I was a mess!" So, hug your kids and remember tonight how much you have to be thankful for, because I now understand how quickly something could change. Thank God it didn't. Or maybe it did, just not in any way that you could see or that would change my Gavy....instead it changed me and made me realize that no matter how tired I am at the end of the day, I have so much to be thankful for.
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